The Stars of The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives Are Ready to Reintroduce Themselves

Taylor Frankie Paul, one of the stars of Hulu’s new reality series The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives, wants to clear a few things up. Yes, she and some of her gang of internet-famous Mormon wives and mothers (also known as #MomTok) were swingers. But that’s not all she, or they, want to be known for.

If you’re lost, a brief refresher. During the pandemic, a group of beautiful, young, Mormon, Utah-based moms who posted videos together dancing grew huge social followings as rumors ran wild that they all were all sleeping with each other. Then, in May 2022, Paul seemed to confirm this when she made a video announcing that she and her husband were splitting up because she violated the rules of the “soft swinging” arrangement the couple had with several others in their #MomTok friend group. Many of the women denied it, some blasted Paul, and the whole thing was rather juicy.

Now, Paul and seven of her #MomTok friends are ready for a new chapter. They’ve filmed The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives, they say, to tell a new story besides the one people have read in salacious headlines or on social media.

“This opportunity came at a time where I did want to tell my story and more of my background of who I am, rather than what the headlines are,” Paul tells Glamour. “I wasn’t just a swinger mom. I wanted to show more of who I was…it was an opportunity, and I took it.”

While not all the women on the show were implicated in the original scandal, the group all identifies, as castmate Jen Affleck (not that one) put it, as “outcasts” in their insular, conservative community. Another castmate, Mikayla Matthews, tells me that her husband has already been fired for her participation. As for Paul, the show follows her as she starts a new relationship, gets arrested for domestic violence, pleads guilty to assault, and has another child.

“I’ve had a lot of lessons learned,” Paul says of her past. “I had to go the hard way, and that was all by my choices that I made in life.”

Ahead of the premiere, Glamour caught up with Paul, Matthews, Affleck, and castmates Demi Engemann, Jessi Ngatikaura, Mayci Neeley, Whitney Leavitt, and Layla Taylor about the stereotypes people still have about them and why they decided to take their content from TikTok to reality TV.

Glamour: The trailer got a huge amount of attention online, both in a positive and negative way. How do you feel now that the show itself is about to come out?

Mikayla Matthews: We [the cast] have mixed emotions. Some days we’re like, Guys, this is amazing! And then the next day we're like, Oh my gosh, people are going to have to watch this. I can’t step outside, I can’t go to the grocery store. I’m going to have to hide in my house. There’s definitely a lot of backlash from the community. I feel like it’s human nature to be judgmental, and so there’s definitely just judgy humans out there, maybe projecting a little bit of their own insecurities on us as well.

Demi Engemann: We’re confident. We have to remember that we were excited to do this and that we at some point were super proud of ourselves. We can’t let the outside opinions and noise get to us. We just need to remain excited and hopeful for the future.

Mayci Neeley: I don’t think I was expecting as negative reaction from our LDS community. It was a little shocking. I understand when I watch it back and think from an LDS perspective. It shows people talking about swinging, talking about drinking, and that’s not traditional in our church, so I understand that. But I do think it was surprising, all the negativity and people being like, “You’re not Mormon. You don’t represent us.” I’m like, well, we’re not trying to represent us. We’re not trying to be a mouthpiece to the church. We’re all on our different journeys within the church.

One of the reasons why #MomTok took off was because people are clearly interested in the lives of Mormon women. What are some misconceptions you’re hoping to dispel with the show about Mormonism and/or MomTok?

Engemann: Well, MomTok, that we’re all swingers.

Neeley: I think the misconception, at least with religion, is that we’re not polygamists, we are normal. Sometimes with the Mormon culture, people think we’re kind of weird, if I’m being honest.

Jessi Ngatikaura: There are so many misconceptions about the Mormon religion. I’ve heard people ask, “You guys are allowed to have social media?” So just clearing up those narratives is going to be interesting.

One thing that stood out for me from watching the show was how everyone pretty much individually said that they found MomTok very empowering. I’m curious, what was it about it that you found so empowering?

Taylor Frankie Paul: Obviously [with] all my past, they took me in and were my friends and supported me. So I feel like that in itself is empowerment.

Jen Affleck: In some way we’re all an outcast within our friends or family. We’re a part of the church, but…we’re definitely not by the book and we’re not cookie-cutter. So I think that’s why as a group we relate so much because we are different and we’re all on different journeys.

Matthews: We kind of trauma-bonded and put it all out there on the show. To be so vulnerable, it’s very empowering to see. Also in Mormon culture, it’s not okay to talk about sex. So it’s empowering to see a group of women who feel comfortable opening up about their sexuality, talking about sex, and learning from each other.

Layla Taylor: It’s been a fun experience to be able to show women that they can do something outside of being a wife or a mother. It’s super empowering to show women that they can have hobbies and interests and find mothers that are going through similar things like us and be able to connect with other women.

What is your dream for the show, and what are your plans for the future?

Matthews: I would love to be set up financially for my family. My husband just lost his job because of this show, so I’m the prime, the one and only, breadwinner now. So yeah, being able to be financially free.

Engemann: Money. [Laughs.] On a real note…we each individually have goals. We have things that we’re working towards, things that we’re passionate about, whether it’s a business or getting on different shows and other opportunities.

Whitney Leavitt: I know that each and every single one of us were so raw and so authentic and so vulnerable in the personal stories or personal situations that were going on in each one of our lives. I hope that a lot of viewers can relate with us, especially women.

This interview has been edited for length and clarity.